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Covert Culture

This week's trek is inspired by Dr. Kim Cameron's research on how to build strong organizational cultures.

Is there a secret culture at your company that people don't openly talk about?

Every company has a formal culture that is celebrated through things like a shared mission, vision, and values. At the same time most organizations also have an informal culture - a set of more covert norms that represent other ways that things get done. As a leader, it's important to take note of the informal aspects of your company's culture and consider how those norms might have an impact on the working dynamics of your team.

Introducing Your Covert Culture Corrector Exercise

What It Is
A 20-minute exercise to help you identify the unspoken rules of your company's culture and determine their contribution to the overall health of your team.

Why We Love It 
Knowing the ins and outs of your covert culture is important to maintaining a healthy team dynamic. This exercise gives you a quick way to identify the unspoken rules that govern how your team operates and determine what you can do to change those that might be undermining your team's success. 

How It Works
1. Make a list of the unspoken cultural norms that govern how things are done at your company. Consider things like having to get airtime in meetings, needing to align with cliques in order to gain influence, and having to act a certain way to get promoted.

2. Review each norm and write out all the reasons why it is critical to the overall success of your team. For example does focusing on airtime in meetings ensure that more junior people get visibility with senior leadership?

3. Now, look at each rule again and write out all the reasons it might detrimental to the success of your team. For example, does focusing on airtime in meetings mean that preferential treatment is given to those with the loudest voices or that meetings tend to drag on?

4. Take a few minutes to review #3 above. Consider which of these items you have the power to change within your specific team. For those items, determine what you, as a leader, can do to counteract the negative effects of those norms on your team. For example if favoring airtime in meetings is starting to make every meeting drag on, set a new rule that gives speakers no more than two minutes to make their point or ask your team to email feedback before the meeting instead of providing it during.

Want to dig deeper into this topic?
Have a favorite trek? 
Hit us up at 
treks@lifetrekkers.me and tell us which one you liked and what you learned!
Here's what your fellow trekkers have to say about past treks:

"Listen Up was one of my favorite treks. It helped me rethink how I engage in conversations and understand what it really takes to actively listen."
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Shankar Desai, Group Manager @ Google
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Shankar Desai
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Bully Buster

This week's trek is inspired by the research of entrepreneur and behavior change expert, Christine Comaford

Have you ever found yourself acting a little too much like Miranda Priestly at work?

Perhaps you crack a joke and realize that it's gone a little too far. Or maybe you make a negative comment about a coworker behind his back. According to Comaford bullying behaviors in the workplace often stem from a desire to feel a greater sense of "safety, belonging, and mattering." The issue, though, is that bullies try to achieve these things in a way that is both inappropriate and damaging to themselves and those around them.

Introducing Your Bully Buster Exercise

What It Is
A 30-minute exercise to help you identify any bullying behaviors you might be bringing into the workplace and determine how you can find a different course of action.

Why We Love It 
While it is easy to see bullying behaviors in others, we rarely take a moment to step back and see how we might be acting in a similar manner on our own teams. This exercise gives you an opportunity to identify the different ways you might be participating in a culture of bullying at work. 

How It Works
1. Take 10 minutes to review the different types of workplace bullies courtesy of FastCo:
- Name Caller: This type of bully likes to call people names and insult them in subtle ways. This person might "embarrass and humiliate in front of others" and might do so from an authoritative position.
- Cutthroat: This individual is competitive and will do damaging things to "come out on top." They believe their "opponent has to lose" and they'll do whatever it takes to undermine that person in some way.
- Intimidator: This individual doesn't want to deal with problems. Instead, they'll try to intimidate those that come forward with issues into staying silent, so the problems themselves don't have to be addressed. 
- Charmer: "This bully is charming to those they seek to take advantage of or who offer opportunity to them" but rude to those that appear to be useless.
- The Gossip: This person "tells stories and defames you behind your back." They damage other people's reputation to try to make themselves look better.

2. Ask yourself if you have ever exhibited any of the behaviors mentioned in #1 above. If none of these are relevant to you, consider your team's dynamic and whether you are allowing any specific individuals to display the above-mentioned behaviors. 

3. Now, for the items you identified in #2, take a few minutes to remember what happened. What specifically did you/your team member say or do? What were you/your team member hoping to achieve with your/their actions? 
What were you feeling at the time? Keep in mind that we often engage in these types of behaviors when we don't feel safe or we believe that we don't matter or fit in. Ask yourself if any of those underlying emotions might have been at play for you or people on your team.

4. Now, consider why the actions you/your team member took might not have been the most effective. What could have been done differently to arrive at a better solution? How might you address the underlying feelings you are having in a healthier way? Going forward, what are the triggers that make you behave like a bully and how might you respond to them differently?

Want to dig deeper into this topic?
Have a favorite trek? 
Hit us up at 
treks@lifetrekkers.me and tell us which one you liked and what you learned!
Here's what your fellow trekkers have to say about past treks:

"The Tutu trek was one of my favorites. Bob Carey's story was really inspiring and the exercise motivated me to reflect on a number of things that I feel vulnerable about in life and the work place."
-
Alex Farivar, Product Manager @ Google
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Copyright © 2018 LifeTrekkers, All rights reserved.

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Shankar Desai
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Tiff Tamer

This week's trek is inspired by Drs. John and Julie Gottman's research at The Gottman Institute on the mathematics and psychology of relationship building.

Do you ever feel underwhelmed by your partner, co-worker, or family member?

The Gottmans' research has shown that not feeling so jazzed about someone you spend a lot of time with is totally normal. However, when you are feeling a lot of conflict brewing between you and a close friend, partner, or family member it can be helpful to take a time out to promote admiration for one another.

Introducing Your Tiff Tamer Exercise

What It Is
A 15-minute exercise for you and your partner to tame a cycle of tiffs by creating more room for appreciation in your relationship.

Why We Love It 
Every now and then we find ourselves in constant conflict with another person - a loved one, a co-worker, or a partner. When this happens it is easy to just write that person off as negative or incapable of doing anything right. This exercise provides an opportunity to take a step back and reconnect with the things you truly appreciate about each other so you can see more sides of that person beyond what's present during conflicts. 

How It Works
1. Take 5 minutes with a significant other, co-worker, or family member to review this adjective list from the Gottman Institute. As you review, circle three adjectives that best describe your exercise partner. Have your him/her do the same for you.

2. Now, for each item you circled think of a specific moment where your exercise partner displayed that specific characteristic. Give yourself a minute to recall what they did and said and how that made you feel.

3. Take 5 more minutes and share what you wrote down with your exercise partner. Give them an opportunity to do the same. 


Source: The Gottman Institute

Want to dig deeper into this topic?
  • For tips on how to make both professional and personal relationships work, read this from HBR.
  • To learn about the 5 biggest working relationship mistakes people make, read this from FastCo.
  • To learn about the characteristics of people who build really strong relationships, read this from Inc.
Have a favorite trek? 
Hit us up at 
treks@lifetrekkers.me and tell us which one you liked and what you learned!
Here's what your fellow trekkers have to say about past treks:

"The 'mindful meals' trek was one of my favorites. It started with one meal, but I've found myself focusing more intently on almost everything I've eaten since.
-
Ev Boyle, Executive Director, LA-tech.org
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Copyright © 2018 LifeTrekkers, All rights reserved.

Want more information? Drop us a line at info@lifetrekkers.me.

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Shankar Desai